I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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