What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
