I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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