So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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