she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
