We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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