Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
