can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
