and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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