i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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