Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
