Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
