So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
