There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
A+ Viking dick
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
