$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
what day is it and did you see me today?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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