brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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