I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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