How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Randomize
