I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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