Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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