Three words: puerto rican gang bang
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
you are never too drunk for berry picking
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
