I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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