this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
