i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
