i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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