He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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