Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
i think we sleep fucked last night...
My breath smells like gin and sadness
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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