i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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