ya dads aren't the best wingmen
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize