I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
