We're facebook friends in real life
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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