why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize