Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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