no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
