Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
