so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
