he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
