So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
