Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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