Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
