So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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