I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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