You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
