Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
