shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
