So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
