I want to make a zoo with you.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
