I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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