Small penises have feelings too.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize