1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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