Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Randomize
