Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
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